Be Not Afraid - Joan

        "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger..." It's sort of like a backhanded compliment; one that even though it's not what you want to hear, it has that 'oh so painful' kernel of truth in it. 

         Personally, I started the summer with a routine medical exam that became anything but, when I stopped breathing and had to be revived. Not surprisingly, nearly dying wasn't on my lengthy "To Do" list! It was scary to realize how close I came to the abyss and it forced me to recognize once again, how life can change in an instant. The good news (besides being alive) was that the incident jump-started my thinking about the experiences and challenges that face all of us as part of our daily life.

         As we prepare for our Georgetown webinar on Spiritual Connection and Successful Collaboration tomorrow, I think about the choices people make, not only in their personal lives but in their careers, and the tug-of-war that often occurs between finding our "ultimate good" as St. Ignatius says and the practical reality of future planning for college expenses or retirement. Over the past several years, I have been fortunate to be part of a vibrant women's group at Boston College where I am surrounded by women who found their vocation whether in health care, education, high finance or family life and I have learned a lot by participating in the equalizing power of our prayer group deepening our bond through seeing the results and strength of our united front as we confront the trials faced by our fellow participants.
                    
         We all know firsthand of the uncertainty that encompasses us, and this summer, fear has become even more palpable. Whether it is, as Katie wrote in July, about the threat of terrorism and ISIS barbarity, or in those we know who are facing treatment for illness or injury and must live with the insecurity of cure, or even on a more personal and simpler level, those nurses, doctors, lawyers, accountants, etc., who study for years, graduate and then have to pass an exam before they are certified to practice their chosen profession.
                               
         This personal fear and uncertainty was laid at my doorstep even more clearly when, the week after my daughter's dreaded Bar Exam, my 91-year old mother began to recover from a fall. We all knew it would be inevitable that she fell; it was never a question of whether, only one of when. The fear she felt, as she too realized her unsteadiness, contributed to tripping her up in the first place. Worse, her fear of pain and dependence almost precluded any recovery. It was hard to acknowledge that sometimes the strength we need to move forward seems too illusive, too ethereal to hold on to, and as a result we might not ever be able to recover from the trauma life throws at us. 
 

         It's easy to say, Rome wasn't built in a day, but when we have to measure progress in weeks or months or even years, not only is it painstaking, but we can easily lose heart. And yet, what doesn't kill you Does make you Stronger.I keep these thoughts in mind as I prepare for a talk in Nantucket next month with Sukey Forbes, a wise woman who has shared the intensity and depth of feeling in losing her daughter and of finding her way to new life as we exploreSpirit and Survival together.

          I am inspired by seeing Sukey's resolve, by admiring the determination in the battle-worn faces in the news after natural and man-made disasters and by reading books like Ayaan Hirsi Ali's Infidel on the injurious treatment of women. I am certainly no biblical scholar, but as I participated in the Pebble Beach Authors and Ideas Festival this past weekend, one presenter closed her remarks with the story of Jacob wrestling the angel. I vaguely remembered the story and the metaphor of man vs God; what I had forgotten was the end of the story, the part that makes the struggle worth the effort - where Jacob wins, but before he relinquishes his hold on his adversary, he asks for a blessing. There is blessing in struggle and it is the power in finding that positive energy, which needs to be shared.
                                  
          St. Timothy says, knowing you have fought the good fight, finished the course and kept the faith; maybe that's the opportunity, the place where change can begin, the place where growth and self-awareness can be given the time to flourish, and the place where we can work to make not only ourselves, but each other Stronger.